


Foggy Boggy Troll Hunters

by FoggyBoggyTrollHunters



Category: Boondock Saints (Movies)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-06-24
Updated: 2012-10-12
Packaged: 2017-11-08 10:05:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 21
Words: 18,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/442028
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FoggyBoggyTrollHunters/pseuds/FoggyBoggyTrollHunters
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Foggy Boggy Troll Hunters are Mello the Luscious Redhead, Jared Harris The Sexy Brit, Emili the Tattooed Siren, & Norman Mother-Fucking Reedus.<br/>The events contained in this story are true and actually happened...in our heads at least. What was once a joke has spawned a story so epic it will blow your mind. Follow us, support us, and last but not least...the trolls are coming...you've been warned.</p><p>Follow us on Tumblr @ http://fbth.tumblr.com/<br/>Plus add us on Twitter! @meliciousdawn & @emisep32</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1

Its early morning in the beautiful mountains of Ireland. Grey wisps of dense fog have descended upon the land, painting an eerie hue on everything it touches.

Mello’s legs are entangled with her lover’s as they finish an early morning session of lovemaking. Jared kisses her one last kiss before sitting up in bed and lighting a cigarette.

“That was a fantastic shagging, Mello, it really was.” There is a light sheen of sweat on his body.

Mello stretches out her long, toned limbs to get out the last kinks from an hour of lovemaking. She smiles slyly for a moment before snatching the cigarette from his lips.   
She takes a long slow drag, never breaking eye contact. A swirl of smoke snakes from her mouth and frames their faces in poison curls.

“I live to please you, my Darling.” She rolls on top of him, straddling his waist, the cigarette dangling from her lips. Her lustful eyes are half-open with her need for him. As he looks up at her, his heart is swollen with his love for her. He takes the last drag from the cigarette, before snuffing it out on the bedside table.

She begins to kiss along his neck, stirring the fires within once again. Suddenly, she hears a long, deep moaning.

“Well somebody’s ready for more.” She giggles as she begins to lick her way to his chest.

“That wasn’t me, Love.” They pause to listen. Out of the corner of their eyes, through the open bedroom window, they see a large, dark shadow looming in the distance. They stare, trying to figure out what they are looking at when they hear another deep groaning, this time closer.

Mello suddenly jumps up and off Jared, her nude body tense and alert. She runs to the closet, digging deep into its contents. Her movements are frantic as she searches. Jared looks at her in alarm.

“What is it, Mello, bears?”

She turns to him, holding the item she had desperately sought.

“Worse,’ she says as she cocks the shotgun in her hands, ‘Trolls.”


	2. 2

Thousands of miles away, midnight has just fallen and New York City is still buzzing with nightlife. The city shines with the twinkling of lit bedroom windows and flickering taxi headlights. Street life sounds provides a soundtrack for Emili as she sketches. She is nestled comfortably in her studio apartment, sketching a nearly nude portrait. 

The only other tenant of the building she owns and resides in, her friend Norman, is posing for her. He holds a squash, placed strategically over his genitalia. His body is solid and lean. She lets her eyes graze quickly over his six pack abs. Her lower belly flutters with invisible butterflies, each carrying the secret of hidden love for him. She is grateful to have an easel to hide her blushing face behind.

She frowns in frustration as she erases a pencil mark for the third time. She tears her gaze away to stare into space, a perturbed look upon her porcelain face.   
Norman notices her annoyance at her latest art project. He is amused by the way she crinkles her nose but contains his chuckles. She purses her lips, blowing a burst of air that stirs her blue black hair from her face.

“Is everything okay?” He asks as he shifts his weight from his left leg to the right.

“Yeah,’ she smiles at him briefly, ‘I’m just having trouble with your mole placement.” 

He looks down at the squash he has been holding in front of his crotch. The gourd is a smooth butter yellow. The base is fat; roughly the size of a baseball and the stem’s 6 inches reaches up, curving delicately to the right. With a devious grin, he glances at her with his devilish charm. “Which mole?”

Suddenly, it is much more difficult to hide her blushing. “I think that’s enough for tonight.” She tosses a clean orange towel to him. “I’ll let you get dressed.” She turns away and walks towards the kitchen to give him some privacy.

“I’m making a gin and tonic, want anything?” She calls over her shoulder. Before he can answer, her phone begins ringing “Baby Got Back.”

“Mello.” Emili smiles to herself as she happily answers her best friend’s call. She feels like she hasn’t spoken to her in years even though it has only been a month. Before   
she can even utter a greeting, Mello begins shrieking on the other end of line. Emili listens intently to what Mello is telling her as she lights a hand-rolled cigarette. She feels the   
color begin to drain from her already pale complexion.

“Are you sure?!” She gasps as she turns to face Norman, in shock from what her friend has said to her.

“What is it?” He asks, still in the same position he’d been posing in for the last half hour.

The only word she could manage to say was, “Trolls.”

Astounded, he drops the squash and it splatters on the concrete floor. Pieces fly to land on his nude body.

Emili follows the path of one rogue piece as it lands on his thigh and she takes in the exquisite form of Norman Reedus.

“Mole my God!”


	3. 3

Emili runs to her bedroom and frantically begins to pack. She barely puts consideration into the clothes she chooses as they are tossed, squished, and rolled to fit in her large skull overnight bag. There needs to be room for the one essential item anyway. Bruce Campbell. Her weapon of choice and prized possession, a machete aptly named because it is long, hard, and always ready for action.

She retrieves Bruce Campbell which is still safely sheathed in the custom leather case Mello had purchased as a birthday gift 3 years ago.

“Hello, Old Friend.” She holds the heavy steel blade in her hands, remembering all the times she has welded it and the vile troll heads it separated from bodies.

“So…trolls.” Norman enters her room, the orange towel wrapped around his lean waist. “Like, real trolls?” He sounds amused.

Emili looks at him, completely serious. “Very real trolls. Big ones too apparently.” She finalizes packing and searches for her leather jacket.

Norman trails her; still unconvinced, but willing to join the game she is playing. “Trolls. Where exactly? New York?”

“No.” she says as she snatches her jacket from under her dresser. “Ireland.”

“Oh. When you said there were trolls, I assumed you meant New York. I mean, Ireland is really far-”

Emili spins around and snaps at him. “Less talking, more package, erm I mean PACKING!”

Suddenly, he is not so sure she is playing a game. “Right”, he says, chastised into submission. When he stalls furthermore, she wordlessly walks to her closet and opens the mahogany doors. She parts the clothing right down the middle exposing a shelf that lay within the closet’s confines. On the shelf sits rows of decayed, dried heads on sticks; heads with pointy hairy ears and sharp little teeth.

“Holy fuck…” his voice trails off as he stares at the heads. They are the size of soccer balls, far too large to be dried apples. He turns to Emili, his voice shaking, “I’ll be upstairs. Meet me there in 15 minutes.” 

He turns and runs out of the room, tearing the towel from his waist and tossing it behind him. It lands on Emili’s head, blocking her view of his retreating buttocks.

After making last minute assessments of her luggage, she heads up the carpeted stairs to Norman’s apartment. She is surprised to see his door open just as she approaches. Not only is he packed, he is showered and clean shaven.

“Let’s go.” He struts past her to descend the stairs when he suddenly pauses on the top step. He looks at her, surveying her body and chosen traveling outfit. She wears a pair of flared jeans, dotted with spots of spilled paint and an off the shoulder Reverend Horton Heat sweater with a lace camisole underneath. Most importantly, she has donned her leather boots. 

The air is filled with what she perceives as sexual tension as he stares at her. She imagines him suddenly rushing to her and ravishing her with an earth shattering kiss. 

Instead he says, “I’ve called Flanery…he’s bringing trail mix.”


	4. 4

Mello picks up one of Jared’s sweaters from the floor and puts it on. It is a soft grey cashmere. She crosses the room to the dresser and pulls out a pair of plain red cotton panties to put on. After that, she crosses the room back to the closet and begins searching for her shotgun shells. 

“I’ve called Emili. She’s coming. We’re going to need all the back-up we can get.” She locates her box of slugs and begins counting them.

“For what?” Jared is still lounging on the bed in all his nude ginger glory. 

She turns to him, nearly dropping her ammunition in the process. “The trolls, Jared, the trolls!”

“Trolls? What are you going on about, Love? There is no such creature, that’s just a silly myth.”

“Oh yeah?” She strides to the window, determined, as she pulls back the lace curtains. Through the trees, there is a dark outline in the distance of a tall, fat creature. It looks to be   
at least 9 feet tall. It’s wide and broad, much like a large ape. “What do you call that?!”

Stunned, Jared slowly rises from the bed and looks out the window. He stares in shock and confusion, trying to decipher what he is looking at, if it’s really a troll. Suddenly, a huge   
hulking creature comes walking from around the corner of the cottage.

“Holy shit!” Jared jumps back and nearly falls off the bed.

Just as quickly, Mello is jumping in front of him and aiming her shotgun at the fat troll. It spots her but before it has time to react; she is shooting it through the open window. The   
shot tears a hole straight through its belly. Its intestines explode in a stinking mess of clumps in the garden where it collapses.

“Damn,” Jared looks at her flabbergasted. “Those were my daisies.”

Mello sets her shotgun on the bed before giving him a quick peck on the lips. “I’m sorry, Baby.”

Numbly, he shrugs his shoulders. His faced has paled and Mello stares at her boyfriend, wondering if this will adversely affect their relationship.

“Get dressed. I’ll go make some tea.” She is reloading the shotgun and adds, almost as an afterthought, “They’ll be arriving in 6 hours by private plane.”

“They?” Jared still hasn’t moved from where he stood the entire time his girlfriend took out an 8 foot troll with a 12-Gauge.

“Yeah, Emili and someone else.” She turns to leave the room.

“Who?” Jared has finally put on an item of clothing, his underwear.

Mello turns and looks at the man she has spent 5 years loving and 3 years dating. 

“I don’t know.”


	5. 5

Emili and Norman are seated side by side in Sean Patrick Flanery’s private plane. The combination of the thick padded seats and low rumble of the plane engine has caused Norman to drift asleep. His head is resting on Emili’s shoulder as he snores. She couldn’t be happier.

She looks out the window at the beautiful lush green of Ireland. Her thoughts are far away from trolls and other monstrosities. Instead, she is thinking it would be a beautiful setting for a wedding. She has just spotted the perfect spot for a romantic photo shoot, when Sean Patrick Flanery’s voice invades her musings.

“Alright you two, put on your parachutes, you got to jump from here!” He’s seated at the yoke of the plane, steering it towards Mello and Jared’s cottage.

With a snort, Norman wakes up, looking around confused. He wipes the last remnants of sleep from his face. “What do you mean jump?”

“Can’t you just land? There’s plenty of space.” Emili is nervous, hoping that Sean Patrick Flanery is playing one of his jokes.

“Sorry, Sean Patrick Flanery has somewhere to be.” He turns to look at them. “Secret mission.”

“So, you want us to jump from a plane? I can’t do that!” Emili is gripping the seat handles so hard her knuckles are turning white.

Norman grabs her hands and holds them. He looks deep into her honey colored eyes.

“Yes you can, Em, I believe in you.” He releases one of her hands so he can gently stroke her cheek. This is all the persuasion she needs as she pulls on her parachute. He does the same and then pulls open the plane door. A cold burst of air rushes in and ruffles their hair and clothing. 

Sean Patrick Flanery rises from the pilot seat to help them secure their luggage and parachutes. Satisfied that they are ready he instructs them. “Alright, when I count to three; you both jump. 1…2…” Instead of saying three, he pushes Norman from the plane. They hear his screams as he falls through the air.

“What the fuucccccccckkkk?” His voice fades away.

Emili turns to Sean Patrick Flanery, clearly shocked. “Why did you just do that!?”

“Less talking, more jumping!” He pushes her from the plane, laughing as her screams die away. “SPF for the win!” He triumphantly shuts the plane door.

~*~*~

Emili and Norman fall through the sky, the cottage drawing nearer, growing larger by the second. Emili can’t stop screaming, sure that she is coming to die.

“I’m going to die. I’m not going to have beautiful babies with the man I love. I’m going to be a splat on the ground before I’m a mother.”

She has just closed her eyes, preparing for her fate, when strong hands are gripping her.

“When I say ‘now’, pull the yellow cord.” Norman’s lips are on her ear, her neck, and she is surprised she can still be aroused when she is so close to dying.

“Okay.” She is braver now. He makes her feel that way. Then he is pushing away from her.

“NOW!”

She pulls first, followed close behind by him. Their free-falling slows into a gentle glide.

Mello and Jared’s roof draws nearer and Emili wonders where they are supposed to land. 

“Aim for that window! Over there in the roof.”

Emili sees the window and angles her body to swing towards it. 

“When you are about 6 feet above it, release the chute from your pack.”

She follows Norman’s orders once more, releasing herself with a squeal. She drops once more, straight through the roof, where she lands in the kitchen chair. An empty teacup and plate sits before her. Another thump and Norman is in the chair beside her.

“Norman,” Jared says, sitting in his typical spot at the head of the kitchen table, “How nice of you to drop in.” He glances at the clock over the sink. “Just in time for tea.”


	6. 6

Mello jumps up from her seat to run around the table and give her best friend a tight hug.

“Em! Oh my God, I’ve missed you! How are you? You look great! We need to catch up. Introduce me to Hotty McHot Pants.” She’s talking quickly in the typical fashion when she is full of caffeine.

“Speaking of pants…where are yours?” Emili is eyeing Mello’s bare legs under the cashmere sweater.

“Pfft, pants, just be glad I’m wearing underwear.” She sits on Jared’s lap, being sure to cross her legs. She is a lady after all.

Norman is trying hard to suppress his laughter while Emili rolls her eyes. 

“Mello, this is my good friend, Norman…Reedus. Norman, this is my best friend, Mello.”

“The infamous Mello, I hear.” Norman rises to plant a kiss on Mello’s extended hand.

“Well, if you are trying to make me blush, you’ll have to try harder. I am dating a man with Irish blood.” She wraps her arms lovingly around Jared’s shoulders.

“Wow…so uh, trolls?” Emili promptly changes the subject.

“Yeah, didn’t you see that big ass motherfucker in our garden?”

Emili and Norman look at each other uneasily.

“Mel, we didn’t see a troll…” 

“What? How could you miss it? Follow me and I’ll show you exactly where I shot him.” She hops off Jared’s lap and trots out of the kitchen.

The other three follow her into the bedroom where she approaches the window and peels back the curtains.

“See, its right here in the garden, in Jared’s….” she pauses in mid-sentence. 

There is no troll. Just bits of flesh and guts and a trail leading away into the line of trees at the edge of their property. “You have GOT to be kidding me. UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLE!”

“You sure you shot him?”

Mello gives Norman a death stare. “I never miss.”

“I still don’t understand. Are you sure it wasn’t just a deer or something?” Jared says.

“How many 8 feet deer have you encountered?” 

Emili whips around to look at Mello 

“8 feet?! EIGHT?!?! You sure it wasn’t two fucking trolls standing on each other’s shoulders?”

Mello pauses and seems to consider this for a moment. 

“I wish. We’ve handled 4 footers before and taken them out with birdshot. I shot this one with a 12 gauge; its guts were splattered. I have no idea how it just got up and walked away.”

Jared walks to the window and looks out, concentrating. 

“Maybe it was dragged away.”

“What?” Mello walks up beside and looks out the window again. 

“Look at the blood trail,” he says, “It looks like something was dragged out of here.”

Norman speaks up behind them from where he is leaning against the doorframe.

“Or crawled out of here.”

The four of them look at each other in silence, digesting the thought that an 8 foot troll was able to walk, or crawl, away after being blasted with a shotgun. Can something be that powerful?

Jared breaks the silence.

“So…a troll?” He smirks with doubt.

Norman, Mello, and Emili are exasperated with him at this point.

“YES!”


	7. 7

“Let me show you guys to the guest room.” 

Mello sashays down the hall to the humble little bedroom she and Jared had converted for guests. It’s a cozy room with a queen sized bed fitted with crisp sage green sheets and matching comforter. There is a granny square afghan laid across the foot, hand crocheted by herself. There is also a cherry wood armoire with a matching writing desk and a small closet.

“As you can see, there is only one bed.” She gives Norman and Emili a charming smile. “You can share it or there is the couch in the den, too.”

Emili and Norman share an awkward glance which causes Mello to grin deviously.

“I’ll let you two get settled.” She says in a sing-song voice before leaving the room.

Norman smiles at Emili before saying, “I’ll take the couch. I’ll just put my things in the closet first.”

“No it’s okay; I don’t mind sleeping on the couch.” Emili is still standing in the door way while Norman is already unpacking his clothes and hanging them on wire hangers.

“Don’t be ridiculous.” 

Emili shrugs behind him and walks over to the armoire. She picks up her duffle bag which has become unzipped. A crocheted Murph Macmanus doll tumbles out onto the floor. They both reach out to grab it, but Norman is quicker. He studies it for a second before handing it to her. She blushes furiously while shoving back into the depths of the bag.

He is sure to turn away to hide his smile. After a moment he clears his throat.

“So, tell me how you know about trolls.”

“Mel and I used to hunt them; the smaller ones at least. It was back in New York when we were roomies; long before she met Jared.” She finishes unpacking her things and sits on the bed.

“Wait,” Norman turns around and faces her, “You HUNTED trolls? Get the fuck out!”

"Yeah, among others things, but that is another story.”

“Wow, Emili Roseanne, bad ass troll hunter. How did you end up hunting trolls?” He sits down next to her on the bed.

“Well, after Mel and I moved to New York from Indiana, we had a hard time making ends meet. We answered an ad in the paper for the graveyard shift, literally at a graveyard. It was supposed to be minor security detail. Y’know watching the grounds at night and reporting intruders. We interviewed with some guy and he hired us both on the spot. I worked the dusk ‘til midnight and Mel relieved me. She worked midnight ‘til dawn. One night as I was ending my shift and Mel was coming on, we heard a strange noise from one of the mausoleums. Me being the scaredy-cat I am, I didn’t want to investigate by myself. So, Mel went with me….” Emili trails off, taking a dramatic pause.

“And…?”

She looks at him, seriously. “Corpse eater.”

“What?” He lies down on the bed, propping himself up on one arm.

“It was a corpse eater.” She continues. “A small troll that eats corpses; eating away at a dead body in the mausoleum. Of course we didn’t know what the fuck it was at the time. We thought it was a raccoon at first. Then it looked at us… It had these big, creepy black eyes. And this mouth full of hundreds of tiny sharp little teeth. We were both frozen in shock until the little fucker leapt and came straight at us. We fucking booked it to the gate but it was locked and we couldn’t find the key. Mel gave me a boost over the gate but she didn’t have time. So she….” Once again she trails off.

“So she what?”  
“I hit the little bastard with a shovel.” Mello’s voice interrupts from the doorway.

Norman squeals and jumps up from the bed in surprise. 

“Fuck! You scared the hell out of me.”

She enters the room and sits on the opposite side of the bed. 

“Sorry. I hit the corpse eater with a shovel. Knocked him off his feet for a second but be came at me again so I hit him harder ‘til I knocked him on his back. Then I took the shovel and chopped his head off.”

“Then we heard the clapping.” Emili continues.

“Clapping?” Norman looks at them both in confusion.

“Yeah, from the old dude that hired us. Turns out he was a troll hunter and he was looking to retire.” Mello explains, looking vacantly out the window at the setting sun on the horizon. “Turns out he wanted to pass the torch onto us; if you can call it that.”

Norman is quiet for a few moments; taking in their story. He sits back on the bed, closer to Emili this time. “So he taught you how to hunt trolls?”

She looks at him and sighs; absentmindedly searching her person for her cigarettes which are still stowed away in her bag. “Not exactly. He told us to get ourselves a really good weapon and figure it out by ourselves. Apparently, we were naturals.”

“Wait, so he just bestowed this task onto you? Why didn’t you just say no?”

“Well, it paid good money.” Mello explained after turning to face him.

“You got paid to hunt trolls?”

“Yeah, well troll parts fetch quite a lot of money on the black market. Hell, I crochet with troll hair sometimes.”  
He looks down at the afghan on the bed slightly disgusted. “So, is the troll you saw this morning one of those corpse eaters?”

“I don’t know what the fuck it is. I’ve never seen a troll this big. Corpse eaters are mean but small little fuckers.” For the first time, she looks slightly frightened. After a moment she gathers herself. “Ain’t nothing Bruce Campbell or Daryl Dixon can’t handle.”

Emili laughs at Norman’s bewildered expression. “I forgot to mention. She named her shotgun Daryl Dixon.”

His smile is bemused. “I see..but Bruce Campbell?”

Emili rises and walks to the armoire. She opens her duffle bag and pulls out her machete and turns to him.

“Norman, meet Bruce Campbell.”

“That is bad ass.” He gazes at the weapon with lust.

“Anybody hungry?” Jared walks in from the kitchen. He is wearing a chef’s apron and it is stained with crimson smudges.

Mello looks up at him with a wide grin. “Famished.”

“Delightful!” He smiles at the three of them. “I’ve put on a roast.”

“And baked potatoes?” Mello springs up from the bed to hop over to him and kiss him tenderly.

He returns her kiss before answering. “Of course, baked potatoes.”

“Awesome.” She turns, smiling brightly at Emili and Norman. “Who wants a beer?”

Norman grins and wraps his arm around Emili’s shoulder.

“I never say no to free beer.”


	8. 8

The group gathers in the kitchen which is rich with the succulent smell of beef. Mello walks to the fridge and begins handing out brown bottles of Guinness.

“You guys get settled while Jared and I finish dinner.” Mello smiles warmly at the other two.

Emili settles herself on the plush dark green sofa. Suddenly, a dying ray of sunlight highlights her profile. Norman pauses to appreciate her beauty and feels his heart skip a beat. 

She pops the cap off her bottle and looks at it; saying to herself. “I need a glass.”

“I’ll be right back.” Norman hurries back to the kitchen where Mello is scrubbing potatoes at the sink. “Hey, Em needs a glass.”

Wordlessly, she retrieves a frosty glass from the freezer and hands it to him.

“Thanks…you know…I make a mean double baked potato.”

“That sounds amazing.” She grabs the glass from his hands. “Why don’t you two boys finish the cooking and catch up while I have a beer with Em.” She skips off to the den to join Emili on the couch.

She makes sure to make her entrance known and waits for Emili to look up at her. She grins and perches delicately on the sofa.

“So, you and Norman Reedus, eh?” Mello hands her the glass.

Emili rolls her eyes. “I wish. It’s not like that though. We are just friends.”

“Yeah but he is totally in love with you.” She says as she sips her beer.

“Shut up.” Emili lights up a cigarette. It’s one of her own, hand-rolled shag in orange paper. Like a nicotine jack-o-lantern.

“C’mon, it’s obvious. He loves you. Maybe he doesn’t know it yet, but he’ll figure it out.” After getting the silent treatment she continues. “Anyhoo, what’s new and exciting in your life?”

“Well, I just got back into the art academy. I really like the classes. I’m painting now.”

“Painting? Really? No more tattoos?”

“Mostly painting. Although I still do some tattooing on the side. When I have free time.” 

“Awesome. What do you paint?”

“Mostly portraits.” Emili fidgets with the tassels on one of the throw pillows.

“Oh really? Like of Norman?” Mello takes the pillow from her and sets it in her lap.

“Yes, amongst others.” Emili downs her beer, hoping Mello is going to drop the subject.

“Really? Like who?”

“Jared Leto, James Franco, Burt Reynolds.”

“Any nudes?”

Emili smirks. She knew the conversation was heading in that direction. She looks towards the kitchen where Norman happens to looking at her from the table where he is scrubbing potatoes. He smiles his signature sideways grin and she can’t help but smile back. Mello notices the exchange.

“Mmmhmmm. Lovebirds. So you have seen him naked.”

“It’s very tasteful nude art…involving strategically placed vegetables.”

"Kinky.”

“Anyway!” Emili takes the liberty of changing the subject herself. “What is new with you?”

“Well, reverse cowgirl for one.”

The two girls burst into giggles. 

Meanwhile in the kitchen, Jared and Norman overhear the peals of laughter.

Norman glances over his shoulder towards the two old friends on the couch “You get the feeling they may be talking about us?”

“I guarantee they are talking about us.” Jared tosses some sage on the roast and shuts the oven door.

“What do you suppose about?”

“Sex. Mainly Mello describing our sex life in great detail.”

“That doesn’t bother you?”

Jared turns to Norman and smiles. He runs his hands through a grey streak in his chestnut hair. “With a girl like Mello, it takes everything in my power not to brag about it myself. Speaking of great girls, are you and Emili…?”

Norman finishes garnishing the potatoes before sticking them in the oven. “No, we’re just friends.”

Jared nods and says nothing further on the subject. They quietly finish cooking and then call Mello and Emili to the table where they finally convince Jared that trolls are real.


	9. 9

Night has fallen and the four friends finally retired after catching up over a delicious dinner by candlelight. Norman is lying on the couch, listening to the sounds of the Irish countryside after dark. He watches the swirls of smoke from his cigarette spiral towards the ceiling. It seems as if only yesterday he was fighting fake zombies and now he is potentially fighting off his friend’s deranged illusions. 

Sleep won’t come for him so he gets up to stumble towards the bathroom, and notices a light within the guest bedroom. He knocks lightly on the door before opening it.

“Em?” 

She is sitting on the bed, crossed-legged smoking a cigarette. Finishing the shading on Norman’s portrait.

“Yeah?” she inquires, still bent over her sketchpad.

He steps into the room and peers over her shoulder. 

“A starving artist never sleeps.” He quips.

Smirking, she looks up at him, noticing his pajamas. They are dark blue silk with pictures of little crossbows. She feels her lower belly flutter. “Nice p.j.’s”

“Thanks. They were a gift from a fan.” He sits down in a chair adjacent to the bed and observes her.

“You gonna watch me work?”

He slumps in the chair, stretching his legs in front of him, and lights another cigarette. “You want me to leave?”

“No, you’re fine. Why are you awake?”

Suddenly, they hear a steady, rhythmic thumping from the other bedroom. Emili sighs as she shades a mole.

“She’s shameless.”

Norman rises from the chair to sit next to Emili on the bed. He puts his chin on her shoulder and watches her put the final touches in the sketchpad. “It looks good.”

“Think so?”

“Yeah.” He reclines on the bed, finishing his cigarette.

She finishes the portrait and sets the sketchpad on the bedside table. When she looks down at Norman, his eyes are closed, dark eyelashes resting on his high cheekbones. She watches the rise and fall of his chest, thinking he is deep asleep. Suddenly, he opens his eyes and she is stares into the frozen blue of his gaze. He lifts a hand and gently wipes away a charcoal smudge from the edge of her mouth.

Stunned, she holds her breath, anticipating his next move. He simply rolls over onto his side, curling up and tucking his arms between his legs; promptly falling asleep.

She sighs sadly and turns off the lamp. She lies down beside him, her back to his and soon they are both asleep.


	10. 10

It is 3 a.m. when they return. The stomping of their footsteps shakes the cottage with each approaching step. As they reach the warm glow of the porch light, the larger one lets out an angry deep roar.

Startled from a lucid dream, Norman turns to look at Emili who is awake. “Did you hear that?”

“Yes.” She whispers, staring with wide eyes at the ceiling.

“What was it?” He asks, fearing he knows.

Before she can even answer, there is a thunderous crash from the living room. Within moments, Mello is running into the bedroom with her shotgun, wearing only a tank top and panties. “Are you hearing this?!”

“Yes,” Emili shouts, jumping from the bed. “What is going on?”

“Trolls; and they are pissed.”

“Trollssss?” Norman squeaks, emphasizing the “s”. “Meaning more than one?”

“Yeah; two at least. You guys get dressed. Em, better grab Bruce Campbell.”

There is another crash from the living room. Jared rushes into the room dressed in brown slacks and a clean button down shirt.

“They’re throwing rocks through the windows. They’re trying to get in!”

“Fuck!” Mello hisses before disappearing from the room.

Emili and Norman begin to throw on their clothes, making no attempts to be modest. Norman puts on a white wife-beater, ripped jeans, steel-toe boots, and a leather jacket, personalized by Emili herself with artwork from her days as a Walking Dead fan. The last and most important item he grabs is his cross-bow.

“You brought a cross-bow?” Emili is in the middle of dressing, standing in the room with one leg in her pants and the other out.

“Fuck yeah! Working on a zombie show had its perks.” He snickers turning away, but not before sneaking a glance at her panties, black lacy boy shorts.

She finishes putting on her clothes; distressed jeans with the legs rolled, a black and white baseball tee with quarter length sleeves, and black leather jacket. She slips a bowie knife into her biker boots.

Mello returns, finally fully clothed for once. She is wearing ripped capris with knee high brown boots, a white tank top with her green vest thrown over it. She is stuffing shotgun shells into the pockets. At her feet she drops her olive green knapsack that she has packed with her troll hunting gear.

She looks over Emili and Norman and nods, satisfied with their chosen clothing.

“We might have to make a run for it.”

 

“How are we getting out of here?” Norman asks as he loads an arrow into the crossbow. Emili notices the way his brow furrows when he concentrates. He is clearly skilled and she feels slightly better about his safety.

 

“There’s a jeep in the shed out back. It belongs to the groundskeeper but I think he keeps the keys in the glove box.” Jared’s voice is shaking and Mello gives him a reassuring hug before giving more commands.

 

“You guys got five minutes. Grab all the weapons we can carry. We don’t know what we are dealing with.”

 

Almost as if to emphasize her statement, a loud crashing is heard from the living room followed by a triumphant grunt.

 

“How are we going to get out of here?” Emili squeals before peering out into the living room where she sees a huge troll is trying to fit its fat body through the window. “Fuck! They’re getting in.”

 

After taking a quick look herself, Mello grabs her bag from the floor. “We have to get out through the roof. I’m going to get the jeep. I’ll be driving around by the garden side. Meet me there and be quick!”

“No! Let me go instead.” Jared’s face is panicked.

“Babe. I’m the one with the shotgun.” Mello turns to leave but then runs back into Jared arms; giving him a passionate but quick kiss.

She runs into the kitchen, making sure to stow her shotgun safely in the holster across her back. After jumping onto the table she effortlessly pulls herself onto the roof and quickly surveys her surroundings. There are two large trolls occupied with breaking into their humble little cottage. One at the front trying to get in through the living room and the other at the side, breaking through the kitchen she has just made a quick escape of. She runs across the roof quickly, her boots making little sound on the cobblestone tiles. She heads towards the back where the large shed is kept and jumps quietly onto a stack of fireplace wood but loses her footing, causes the logs to crash and begin to roll across the lawn.

“Fuck…” She mouths quietly. Silently, she prays that neither of the trolls heard her. She tiptoes quickly across the yard, mentally calculating the feet to the jeep.

”30 feet…not so bad I got this. 25…20….”

Suddenly there is bellowing behind her and she turns her head to see 8 feet of dirty, rugged mountain troll running towards her.

“HOLY FUCK!” 

Adrenaline kicks in as she high-tails it to the shed, praying to the Gods that she makes it in time. 

“15 feet! Only 15 feet!”

 

Norman and Emili finish packing duffle bags with any other suitable weapon they can find in the house; mainly kitchen knives and a bottle of wasp spray. When they finish, the three of them head to the kitchen.

“Ladies first!” Norman turns to Emili smiling. He gives Emili a boost towards the roof window. She pulls herself up and Jared and Norman toss the duffle bags and weapons up to her Hastily, she sets them next to her so she can offer her arm to pull one of the boys up.

“Okay, J.” Norman says turning to Jared. “I’ll boost you up.”

“No, you first. I insist as you are a guest.”

Emili chuckles and rolls her eyes at his British refinement. “We don’t have time for fucking manners. Let’s go now!”

“You heard the lady.” Norman puts his foot into Jared’s palms. With nary a warning, Jared is thrusting him through the sky roof. Emili grips Norman’s arm with hers and pulls him onto the roof. She falls backwards and he collapses on top of her; chest to chest.

“I’m so sorry.” Both their heartbeats quicken until they are in sync.

“Wow.” She is noticing for the first time the tiny flecks of sea foam green in his eyes.

“What?” He stares down at her, unconsciously settling his body to mold more comfortable with her body.

“I’ve never seen you blush before.” 

Norman looks seriously into Emili’s eyes and before she realizes what is happening, his lips are inching nearer. She lifts her lips to invite him in further when Jared’s frantic voice spoils the moment.

“A little help here?!” A loud ripping and crunching sound suddenly erupts from the living room. “FUCK! It’s coming!”

Norman hops up and rushes to the window. Jared is jumping on the dining table, trying to grasp the end of the window to pull himself through. Norman catches Jared’s arm and starts to pull. Emili comes around and grasps his other arm. They pull him halfway through when a sharp tug from Jared’s lower half causes them to lose their grasp as they try not to fall through the roof. The other troll has pulled Jared where he has fallen onto the kitchen floor. The troll looms over him, its 9 foot frame hunched over in the tiny kitchen. 

“OH SHIT! This is how I am going to die. Eaten by a fucking troll?!” 

Suddenly, a whooshing sound flies through the air. An arrow is now in the place where the troll’s right eye used to be. Jared quickly rolls out the way as the troll comes crashing onto the hardwood floors, taking out cabinets and the kitchen sink in the process. Gasping for air, he looks up at Norman’s face atop the roof. 

“Thanks for that.”

Instead of welcoming him he says, “We got to go, now!”

Jared gets up from the floor and jumps onto the kitchen table once more. Norman and Emili are able to pull him quickly onto the roof. 

Emili is gasping for breath from everything that has occurred within the last few moments. When she maintains her composure she looks at Jared. “Where’s the other one?”

He walks to the edge of the roof and look out onto the back lawn. He sees Mello as she is frantically running towards the shed, the other troll closely at her heels.

“Oh my God, Mello!”

 

Mello barely makes it to the shed. She crashes through the side door and quickly utilizes a tall metal shelf filled with gardening supplies to barricade the door. She throws her knapsack and shot gun in the passenger seat of the black Jeep Wrangler. Luckily the top is down, leaving the seats exposed and easily accessible. She searches the glove box for the keys and thankfully they are there. 

“Oh, you better have gas, baby!” She tells the jeep before turning the key in the ignition. It sputters. 

“C’mon you fucker; START!” 

The third times the charm as the engine finally turns over and the glorious purr of the motor is heard. Her joy is short lived as the troll comes crashing through the door, a mere 6 feet from the jeep. 

“No time to be neat about this.” She lead foots the gas pedal, crashing straight through the wooden doors of the shed. She speeds quickly towards the left side of the cottage, screaming all the while…

 

On the roof, Emili is filled with pride for her friend. The badass has sent the jeep crashing through the shed doors and is speeding towards them. Her red head flying in the wind like flames.

“What’s she saying?” Norman asks, feeling a tug in his stomach himself. He thinks they are going to become good friends.

The trio listen to Mello’s screaming voice as she gets closer. They see the troll chasing after her and then they connect the dots.

“She’s saying jump!” Jared is grabbing their bags and shouldering them.

“What?” Emili takes the bag with Bruce Campbell, feeling safer with it on her.

They barely have time to react as Mello closes in on the cottage. Jared runs a few feet along the roof, following the path of the jeep and jumps, landing half in the front seat half in the back. He settles himself in the passenger seat alongside Mello, putting her shotgun in his lap.

Next, Emili jumps; landing in the backseat. 

Finally, Norman runs the remaining length of the roof, narrowly missing the edge before jumping and landing on the hood of the jeep. He tosses his bags to Emili and jumps into the small space between Mello and Jared. He straddles the seats as he takes aim with the crossbow, trying to stay steady as Mello drives around the obstacle course of shrubbery and lawn ornaments.

“What are you doing?!” Emili screams at him, holding on to her seat to keep from being jostled too much.

Instead of answering her, he shoots an arrow at the troll, but misses as Mello suddenly takes a sharp turn onto the road. He lands hard on his tailbone then stumbles into the backseat beside Emili.

They drive quietly for a few miles; still in shock from what had happened during the last 10 minutes. Norman is the one to break the silence.

“I need a drink.”

“There’s a pub up the road.” Jared mutters staring at the lines of trees as they drive away.

“Would a pub be open this early?” The sun was just beginning to rise on the horizon.

He turns to glance at Norman. “We know someone.; always good for a favor.” 

Mello looks at Jared and smiles.

“Vick.”


	11. 11

They reach “Johnnie Foxes” after driving another 10 miles down the road. It is a gorgeous 2 story building painted white. The exterior is full of lush landscaping and a colorful array of flowers. The scent reaches their nostrils before they even park the jeep in front of the wide glass door. Jared reaches over and honks the horn. He jumps out of the jeep and bellows to the top floor.

“Oy! Wake up you drunk bastard!” He honks the horn a couple more times until a tall, lanky fella comes stumbling to the window. “There you are you twat!”

“Whosat outside m’fookin door at far in da morning shouting rude obscenities at me whilst I dream of a lovely lass with tits the size of the Isle herself?” Vick is a scruffy man with a thick Irish accent. He is donned in a long striped nightshirt. He scratches at his curly dark hair, trying to wake.

“You know exactly who I am! I’ve guests! We’ve come to eat!” Jared heckles at his old friend.

“Got an idea fer ya, go somewhere tha’s open! We’re closed, or didn’t you realize that when you pulled and there were NO CARS save fer me own?” Vick scratches himself under the nightshirt.

“Now, Victor, that’s no way to talk while guests are present.”

Mello, seeing that Victor isn’t going to budge, hops out of the jeep. She saunters to stand in front of Jared and juts her hip to the side while crossing her arms.

“Hi Vick.” She puts a sultry note in her voice.

He stops scratching and looks down at the group. 

“Dost mine ears deceive me or is tha the voice of an angel? Mel’s wit’cha Jared?”

“The one and only…Vick, I’m famished and I’ve my friends here all the way from New York . I told them you’ve the best Irish breakfast in all of Ireland.”

“Darlin, you realize it’s really early-“ He pouts, which looks charming on his 40 year old face.

”I’m sorry, but they just got in and we’re really hungry…PLLLLEEASEEE?!?”

“Right,” he sighs, defeated. “Well you and your friends can come in but that ugly fookin’ troll with you can eat wit’ da hounds fer all I care.” 

The four immediately turn to look at each other frantically and Vick laughs. 

“What’s the matter wit’cha, only jokin.” He disappears from the window and moments later, the front door of the pub is opening.

"Ah it’s freezin’! Hurry inside befor’ me dick’s the size of a baybeh’s!” 

“You all get inside. I’ll pull the jeep around back.” Jared hops in the jeep and drives to the rear of the building.


	12. 12

Mello, Norman, and Emili had just settled themselves in seats at the bar when Jared strolls inside. He gives Vick a once-over, raising his right eyebrow and taking note of his scrawny legs. 

“Gonna change and will be ‘round momentarily. Jared, you can make coffee, right?” 

“Among other things.” Mello says coyly. Jared walks to stand behind her at the stool so he can snake his arm around her waist and kiss the back of her neck tenderly.

“I tank I’m gonna be sick. You stop tha’.” Vick makes a gagging sound which causes Mello and Jared to laugh.

“Why, Vick I do believe green is not your color.”

“Just make the coffee, you dirty fooker whilst I go get pretty.” Vick disappears up the stairs.

Norman looks around taking in the décor, when he notices a hunting picture. He gets up to take a closer look and recognizes Vick, but no one else. Vick’s standing on what looks to be a large mound of an animal, grinning ear to ear. Suddenly, he sees Emili standing behind him in the reflection. He turns to face her noticing the slight tint of orange in her eyes. “Hey”

“What did you find?” She stands next to him looking at the pictures on the wall.

“Oh, uh, nothing, just looking. I dig it.” He twirls his finger to indicate the surroundings. “This place; reminds me of the bar back home.”

She smirks and motions to a dead animal mounted on the wall. “’Cept you don’t have the boars head.”

“Yeah well, I couldn’t get Flannery to sit still for that long.” Emili and Norman laugh awkwardly for a moment and then they fall silent. Emili takes a deep breath and Norman clears his throat. “So-“

“So…trolls.”

“Yeah..and about what happened on the roof.”

“Can we talk about that later? I can’t process anything right now. I need coffee.”

Almost as if overhearing, Mello calls to them. “Coffee’s ready guys.” They join her at the bar where Jared is serving up the mugs. He pulls down a bottle of Jameson and adds a bit to each of their coffees.

Vick comes down the stairs clothed in black slacks, suspenders, and a white buttoned shirt. He slides a black fedora on his head. “So, wot we havin’?”

Mello gestures to her steaming mug and answers him, doing her best zombie impression. “Cooofffeeeee….”

Jared slides onto the stool next to her and whispers into her ear. “Mello, love, you have to eat something. You just had a foot race against a troll and won.” She grimaces at the memory.

“Takin’ orders. Speak da fuck up.” Vick grabs an apron from below the bar and puts it on.

“Pancakes!” Mello requests, smiling brightly.

“Omelettes.” Emili adds.

Vick winks and clicks his tongue. “Bangers and Mash it is.” He walks to the kitchen. The others look at each other uneasily. Everyone, except Jared who is laughing at their expressions.

“Just be thankful he’s not cooking a Traditional Irish Breakfast, unless you like to start your day with blood pudding.”

“I don’t typically start my day with barely outrunning a mountain troll so blood pudding would be a welcome alternative.” Mello she sips her coffee and snickers, looking at Emili and Norman. She was hoping for a laugh or even a grin, but instead they are staring awkwardly at their surroundings. Anywhere, but not at each other.

“Potty break!” She grabs Emili by the arm and yanks her away to the bathroom.

Jared stares after them. “Why do women always attend the bathroom in pairs?”

“I suppose it has to do with helping each other hover over the toilet.” Norman says, nodding as if that had to be the reason.

 

The girls make a quick check of their reflections in the mirror. Naturally, they look haggard and stressed.

“I look like hell…” Mello is running her fingers through her tangled hair.

“Shut up, you always look pretty.” 

Mello rolls her eyes as she turns to Emili “So what’s with all the awkwardness between you and Norman. Did you guys fuck last night?”

Emili looks down at the sink blushing.

“You did?!”

“No! We just fell asleep talking. Or I put him to sleep with my talking.” Emili shrugs at her.

“Oh.” Mello looks disappointed.

Emili is happy she has something to tell her though. “And he almost kissed me on the roof.”

What? When?” Mello jumps up and down, practically clapping her hands.

“Right before he shot the troll trying to eat Jared.” Emili smiles.

Suddenly, Mello is still. “What…” She runs from the bathroom, straight to Jared. “A troll?! A fucking troll!?”

“What?” Jared looks at her, utterly confused.

“A troll almost eats you and you don’t fucking tell me?!” She paces the floor as she rants. “You British bastard!”

Emili tiptoes around her and sits next to Norman.

“I thought he was Irish.” He whispers to her.

“Ssshhhh…”

“Well, love,” Jared speaks calmly, “I didn’t really have the chance.”

Mello puts her hand up to silence him. “Just shut up for a second.” She turns and walks away to gather her composure. After a moment she comes back. “I’m only going to say this once, because I know I am going to sound like some obsessed twit, but my world kind of revolves around you. If you ever die, I will fucking kill you!”

“I’d kind of already be dead, dear.” He smiles at her, amused.

“Oh just shut up and kiss me before I cry.”

He promptly obeys, coiling his arm around her waist to bring her closer. They get lost in each other for a moment causing Emili and Norman to share an awkward glance. They finally part when they hear Vick enter from the kitchen with breakfast. 

 

He grins at them. “Who wants blood puddin’?


	13. 13

Thankfully, Vick was only joking about the blood pudding. He had actually prepared a breakfast of pancakes, eggs, sausages, biscuits and gravy, and mash. He had devoured his meal down so he could start preparing the bar for today’s business. This gave the group an opportunity to talk privately.

“Our cottage must be destroyed by now.” Mello says somberly as she pokes at the remaining edges of her pancakes. She typically only eats the middle portion that was moist with butter.

“What are we going to do now?” Emili inquires as she finishes the last bit of biscuits and gravy.

“We’ve no other lodgings here.” Jared informs them. 

Norman thinks for a moment. “We could camp.” He shrugs. Emili stares at him, imagining spending the night in a tent with him. They would be nestled together in sleeping bags, possibly only one. She would take that over a cozy bed any day.

“Camp and then what?” She asks.

“Kill the trolls of course.” Mello says as if that were the only obvious answer.

She and Emili look at each other, mentally conveying a message. “Troll hunters ‘til we die.” Emili nods.

“What?” Jared queries, watching the girl’s expressions fall into looks of sadness. Mello looks at him, taking a long pause before explaining.

“Trolls hunters ‘til we die. We have no choice. We have to hunt them. That first corpse eater we killed marked us for life.”

“Wait; but what about that guy from the cemetery. Didn’t he retire or something?” Norman pushes his plate away.

“Not exactly.” Emili mutters. They fall silent once more.

“What exactly aren’t you telling us?” Jared asks them both, but looking only at Mello. She refuses to make eye contact. Afraid to make eye contact. Instead she speaks as she stares into her coffee mug.

“We’re marked. We can’t stop even if we wanted to. They’ll always find us.”

“How do you know?”

“That’s what the guy told us; after we had been in it for a year. The money wasn’t worth it anymore and we tried to stop. We tracked him down. Apparently, the only way to stop them from targeting you is to either die or pass on the torch to someone willing…or stupid enough to kill a troll and become marked.” Emili explains.

“So you didn’t choose this exactly.” Jared says softly.

“Wait. So I’m marked now?” Norman asks, bewildered.

“We don’t even know if that one is dead yet.” Emili tells him trying to put him at ease.

“Yeah,” Mello adds, ““So you two can walk away from all this. It is not your duty, it’s ours.”

Norman looks at Mello and then at Emili. He speaks with determination. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Jared doesn’t need to speak. He only embraces Mello and for the first time, in a long time, she lets her tears fall. 

“I’m so sorry.” Her voice catches and he kisses the top of her head to calm her.

Norman watches them embrace and reaches his arm across the bar to catch Emili’s hand and lace his fingers with hers. She smiles at him and they hold each other’s gaze.

They all sit like this, in perfect silence as they think of everything that has happened and the events yet to come. 

Swiftly, Vick appears from behind the swinging doors of the kitchen and looks upon the group. He takes a deep breath before he speaks.

“If yer goin’ troll huntin’. I got a mighty fine flame-thrower that outta do some damage.”

All four of their heads snap up to look at him. After a moment, Jared breaks the silence.

“Did everyone know about trolls but me?”


	14. 14

They hit the camping mother lode with Vick. He had two tents, a portable fire pit, lanterns, matches, sleeping bags, and a crank radio. Norman and Jared are loading up the jeep when Vick came strolling out of the pub.

“Ain’t gon to be mooch of a campin without these.” Smiling, he holds up two bottles of his finest Irish Whiskey.

Mello saunters over to him with a flirtatious grin on her lips.

“Oh Vick, you know whiskey makes me frisky.”

He grins wider and winks at her.

“In that case, perhaps I should come too.”

She laughs and wraps her arms around him, giving him a kiss on the cheek. 

Abruptly, in the distance, they hear a rumble.

Norman stops mid-stride to the jeep, holding a box of food and looks towards the sound.

“Was that thunder?”

Emili also looks to where they heard the sound.

“You have GOT to be kidding me.”

“Is that…” Jared trails off as the rumble turns into the sounds of massive feet; coming closer.

“How far would you say?” Mello leaves Vick’s side to stand next to Emili.

“Couple miles, give or take.” Emili answers after taking a minute to listen.

Mello moves to stand next to Jared. “Babe, we need to move.” The sound is getting louder. 

Norman looks around and notices the end of a motorcycle, partially hidden beside the pub.

“Vick, I know we just met but can I borrow your bike, man?”

Vick nods wordlessly and Norman dashes to hop on the bike. Emili runs up to grasp his upper arm, just as straddles the bike. It’s an Indian, black chrome with a long brown leather seat.

“What are you doing?” She asks him firmly.

“I’m creating a distraction. I figure if I ride off one way, it’ll come for me and you guys would have a chance to get away.”

“And then what, Norman? You expect me to just let you ride off? You don’t know what you’re dealing with.” For the first time, she is getting pissed at him and he can hear it in her voice.

He raises his voice as he answers. “I don’t want it to come for you. This way you’ll have a chance-“

“It doesn’t want you!” She cuts him off, agitated. “It wants us. If you ride off, it’s gonna just come in the direction of the jeep. We-‘ ,she motions to Mello and herself, ‘don’t know exactly what we’re dealing with here.” Her grasp on his arm softens and she speaks more quietly. “I don’t want you to go.”

Norman tenderly strokes her cheek as her eyes fill with tears. She looks down as he cups her face. With resolve she looks over at Jared and MEllo and speaks to them.

“Look, we’re gonna need to separate.”

“ARE YOU INSANE?!” Mello begins screaming.

“Mel, we gotta. Norman and I will go one way and throw it off your trail. You guys head the other direction and text me your coordinates. We will find you, I promise.”

“What if there’s more than one?” 

“Then we will fucking deal with it then! Trust me!”

The roaring is louder than ever signifying the troll is less than a mile away. Emili gives Mello a “now or never” look and she sighs, giving in. She opens the door of the jeep and gets in.

Vick comes walking from the shed around the corner. He holds in his hands a flame-thrower with a proud look on his face. He hands it off to Jared as if it were a baby.

“You know how to use it?” He asks him.

“I think I can manage.” Jared looks down, examining it.

“Take care of y’rself, brother.” He gives him a firm pat on the shoulder.

“I shall.” 

Norman starts the motorcycle. He looks at Emili and she jumps on the back, wrapping her arms around his body. Just then, the trees part and out steps a gigantic troll, at least 9 feet tall. It snarls at them as they simply stare, taking in what they’re seeing. Norman revs his engine. He shouts over the rumble.

“We’ll go right! Wait a moment till you see him follow us and then you two take off.” 

Mello nods at Jared as he tosses the flame-thrower in the backseat. He hops into the passenger seat and fastens his seatbelt. 

Norman pulls away and slowly starts down the path leading to the road.

The troll notices immediately but stands its ground and surveys the scene and the small humans before him. 

Emili and Norman’s breath are coming out in rasps. 

“It’s not moving.” He whispers to her. 

"What do we do?” She asks, staring at the troll. She reaches into her boot, retrieving her Bowie knife. Norman glances at it and then her.

“What the hell is that dinky thing?”

She stands on the bike and chucks the knife at the trolls face. The knife lands in the troll’s right shoulder causing it to roar angrily. It looks them with a look of malice and the two stare up at it. 

Norman revs the motorcycle engine again, taunting it as Emili whispers.

“Go…NOW!” The motorcycle speeds down the road as the troll howls and runs after it. 

Mello, Jared, and Vick watch in horror and wait to see if any more come out. 

“Just one.” Mello murmurs to herself. She starts the jeep and pulls out to the right to follow Emili and Norman. Jared begins to panic.

“Mello, love. That wasn’t the plan!”

“I’m not gonna let them do this alone! I can’t, not until we know everything about this troll!” 

They continue to speed down the road all the while keeping considerable distance from the troll. She continues to watch as the troll seemingly becomes faster, gaining on Norman and Emili.

Norman glimpses in the side mirror and sees the troll getting closer. He guns the engine to go faster and shouts to Emili.

“Em! I don’t know how much longer we can outrun it!” 

“Just a little further!” She responds. “I gotta find a side road!”

Mello, seeing no other option, commands Jared. “Take the wheel.”

He is staring in horror at the massive beast pursuing them and breaks out of his trance at the sound of her voice. “What?”

“I gotta slow it down, take the wheel” 

Jared, understanding what needs to be done, leans over to grab the wheel as Mello reaches back to grab Daryl Dixon from the backseat. She checks to see if it’s loaded and grabs the bar above the windshield to stand up. Jared slides over a bit more to the driver seat as she leans forward to set up her shot. 

Quickly, she aims and shoots. Her shot successfully blows the trolls right ear off. There’s a loud roar. 

Hearing the shotgun blast, Emili turns to see Mello shooting at the troll and Jared driving the jeep. The troll slows in pace but continues to chase her and Norman. 

“GODDAMIT!” Mello shouts. 

She reloads and cocks the shot gun and shoots again, this time hitting the troll in back of the knee cap. It begins to stumble. 

Norman is watching from the side mirror and instructs Emili to “hold on.” 

Emili clings to Norman as he spins the bike around. The two watch as the troll stumbles to the ground. 

Norman grabs his crossbow and shoots the troll in the neck. The troll immediately stops moving. Jared takes a sharp turn around the troll body and stops shortly in front of it.

The group is breathing heavily waiting for any movement from the troll but there is nothing. 

Emili gets off the bike and moves closer. Norman turns off the motorcycle.

Mello jumps out of the jeep with her shot gun at the ready for any sudden movements from the troll. 

Norman glances at Jared and watches with him as Mello moves closer. Emili also walks over to the troll. 

There’s no breathing. She is fearful that it was Norman’s shot that killed the troll, which would mean he, too, would be marked. 

She suddenly grabs Bruce Campbell from her side and slices the trolls head off. Now, it’s really dead. A tension is lifted and the other three watch as Emili grabs the troll head and holds it up to them. She is splattered with troll blood, a thick green syrupy mess. 

“Well, it’s dead.”

“Well, I would certainly hope so!” Jared says.

Norman and Mello chuckle as Emili drops the troll head on the ground. Norman strides over and hugs her. They separate and gaze into each other’s eyes. 

Jared walks over to the troll and stares at his dead body. 

“How big would you say this is?”

Emili breaks away from Norman and walks to stand by Jared.

“Nine feet, tops.”

Jared studies the troll some more. “He looks a bit familiar.”

“Darling, how can it be familiar?” Mello asks. “You couldn’t even grasp the concept that trolls existed.”

“Yes, quite, but this one…”

Norman crouches to look into the troll’s head lying on the ground.

“It has both its eyes.”

“What?” Mello asks, not quite understanding.”

“The troll, the one that went after J, I shot it in the eye. This one has both its eyes.” He looks up at her.

“Then it’s gotta be the one from the garden.” Mello walks over to study the troll’s body and sees no tell-tale hole in its stomach. She ponders over it for a moment.

“That’s…odd.” She looks at Emili who’s still looking at the head. Its deep black eyes are staring up at her. “Hey, Em, you don’t suppose…?”

“There’s more?” She asks, still staring at the head.

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Mello rubs her hands over her face.

“Only one way to find out.”

“Yeah, let’s find a place to set up camp.”


	15. 15

The group found a place to set up camp, deep within the woods in a clearing. They figured that being surrounded by foliage would give them the advantage of hearing any intruders.

Jared and Norman set up the tents, while Mello and Emili build a small fire to cook over. Their choices for dinner were limited; hot dogs, baked beans, marshmallows, and several bags of crisps. When they were thirsty, they had water to drink and of course, the whiskey.

“Fire good!” Mello exclaims as the dry leaves and logs began to smoke. She adds more kindling to encourage it to flame.

“I think we should eat hot dogs tonight. Why save the good stuff for later, right?” Emili says coming up beside her carrying the food.

“I agree!” Mello answers. “Tonight, we eat like kings!” She was getting slaphappy from being on limited sleep. Big flames began to crackle and spit. “Yes! Who needs a man?”

“We are good for some things.” Jared replies as he ducks out from within their tent.

“True.” She replies, shrugging.

“I’m hungry.” Norman is carrying several more logs and set them down close to the fire.

“We are going to start dinner now.” Emili unwraps the packages and places wieners on sticks before passing them around.

They settle themselves around the fire, two on each side. Mello nestles close to Jared as she roasts her hot dog. Across from them, Norman and Emili sit next to each other, their legs touching. 

After they sat in silence for a considerable amount of time, Norman begins to speak.

“This kind of reminds me of a bad night I had a few years back.” He says, staring into the flames almost as if he were hypnotized.

“I’m going to shed a tear for Ireland.” Jared interrupts suddenly, standing up.

Emili looks at him confused as he walks off into the trees.

“He’s going to take a piss.” Mello explains. “So what happened?” She asks Norman, encouraging him to continue his story.

“This was probably 10 years ago. I was sitting around with my buddy Joe at his apartment drinking when we get the idea to go camping. In our drunken state, we decided we were going to rough it. Meaning, not bring any food. We were going to hunt for our dinner, right? So we pack up our shit; a tent, some blankets, pillows, and of course,the beer. No toilet paper though, since we were roughing it. We were just gonna wipe our asses with leaves.”

Mello and Emili look at each other across the fire and begin laughing in unison. They pass a bottle whiskey back and forth, taking sips of its burning amber contents.

“We drive 15 miles into the next county.” He continues. “Then we walk a good 45 minutes into the woods until we find a place to set-up camp. We pitch the tent, take our shits, and then polish off a 12-pack. We are fucking starving and it is at this point we realize…we didn’t bring a goddamn gun.” 

The two girls are laughing hysterically at this point, both more than a little drunk themselves. 

“So we have no choice but to forage for nuts and shit. So we go out in separate directions. I look for, I don’t know, an hour? Can’t find shit other than mushrooms but I didn’t know how to tell if they were poisonous. So I just head back to camp, hoping Joe had more luck. I get back, he ain’t there. Another hour passes, he still doesn’t show up. I call his cell-phone…”

“Wait, your cell-phone? I thought you were roughing it.” Emili asks teasingly.

“Yeah well, we had them on vibrate. Anyway, I call it and I hear it like humming. He fucking left it behind. So, at this point I don’t know what to do. So I just went to sleep.”

“You went to sleep?” Mello asks astounded.

“Well, yeah. I figured he would find his way back eventually. Anyway, I’m passed out for a few hours but there is this scratching on the tent that wakes me up.”

“Scratching?” Emili is getting freaked out. It was the combination of being in the woods, Norman’s story, and drinking her fair share of whiskey. She inches slightly closer to Norman.

“Yeah, scratching…like fingernails.”

“Fingernails?” Mello scoffs, smirking at him. “I know exactly where this is going. You are so full of shit! This is the oldest urban legend in the book. Let me guess, Joe was hanging from the tree, his fingernails scratching the tent.”

“No. When I got up to look, it wasn’t Joe scratching the tent.”

It seems as if Norman isn’t going to continue the story. He seems to hesitate, waiting for some cue.

“Who was it?” The words are barely out Emili’s mouth before someone comes crashing from out of the woods behind her.

“IT WAS ME!!!!” Jared roars as he comes rushing at her. She screams and jumps up from the log she was sitting on. Mello also screams in shock and tumbles backwards from her log. Norman and Jared are laughing hysterically.

Emili recovers from the shock of nearly being attacked from what could have been a deranged lunatic. She glares at the two men who are still laughing, bent over and holding their stomachs.

`“You two are assholes.” Mello says. Jared barely ceases laughing when he glances at her; she is still flat on her back on the ground, her legs lying over the log. He bursts out laughing again.

“Baby, help me up!” Mello pouts while she waits for Jared to do her bidding. He chuckles one last time then comes over to help her. “You are such an ass.” She laughs and gently shoves him away.

“I’m going to bed.” Emili stomps away and disappears into the tent. The other three look at each other in surprise.

“I think she’s really pissed, maybe I should go talk to her.” Mello turns to follow her but stops when she feels Norman’s hand on her shoulder.

“No, let me.” Norman follows Emili into the tent. She is sitting with her back to him, fixing her sleeping bag.

“Hey.” He says quietly crouching behind her. She ignores him and fluffs up her pillow. “How ya doing?”

She spins around to glare at him before speaking.

“Well, here’s a scary story for you. Four people go into the woods and tell scary stories. One of them pops out and scares the others, causing one of them to go insane and hack them all into little pieces in the middle of the night!” She shrieks.

“Oh come on, Em! You are overreacting!”

“Overreacting?! Look around you! Look where we are! Look at what we are doing! Yesterday I was painting in my studio and today I am worrying that the man I am in love with is going to be killed by a fucking mountain troll before I have a chance to tell…him!” She suddenly stops, shocked that the truth had escaped her lips before her stupid drunk brain had the chance to stop them. Her breath is coming out in gasps and she doesn’t know if it is from being winded or from fear.

Then Norman’s hands are on her face and his lips crashing onto hers. They tumble backwards onto the sleeping bag, hungrily kissing each other. She gasps as his hand moves from her face to touch her body. She feels the warmth of his touch across her belly. His touch is gentle, while his mouth which has found its way to her neck. His nips at the sweet spot behind her ear and she shivers.

She moans quietly as he begins to gently bite along her neck. He stops when he reaches the barrier of her shirt collar. He sits up, straddling her body so he can peel the shirt from her. She arches her back, to aid him along. It comes off with one smooth motion and he looks at her lying there like a raven haired goddess. Her creamy pale skin was waiting to be licked like a bowl of milk.

He runs his hands over her breasts, covered in black lace, bringing one of his hands to rest on her cheek and she turns her face to kiss his palm. He looks at her tenderly before saying the three words she always wanted to hear, but never thought she would.

“I love you.”

She reaches up to wrap her arms around his neck and brings his lips to hers once more. They savor the taste of each other, pausing only so she could rip Norman’s shirt from his body. She licks and nips at his chest, finally enticing a moan from him. She moves to flip him onto his back so she can kiss along his stomach.

When she reaches his groin, she begins to lick and bite once more, teasing him. She runs her arms up the sides of his thighs until they meet at the button of his pants. She sits up so she could unzip and slide them down his hips. 

His fingers graze her back, leaving faint red marks from his nails. He unhooks her bra, freeing her ample bosom. Her breasts tender from being confined so the feel of his teeth on her nipples causes her to moan even louder. The effect he has on her makes his erection grow harder.

Once again, he is flipping her onto her back. He quickly unbuttons her pants and rips them from her body, followed close behind by her panties. 

She helps him remove his boxers. Smiling as she pulls off the material, flames with the “little hot stuff” devil.

He rubs his hand on her pussy ensuring she is wet enough to accommodate his girth. The feel of his fingers on her, in her, causes her to pant and whimper. He kisses her luscious lips again and then he slides into her.

Entwined together, they feel complete. Their bodies seemed to be meant for each other, molding and connecting in all the right places.

He begins to move in and out of her, slowly, pulling his length out before plunging into her again. She wraps her legs around his back to feel him deeper within her. She moans even louder as he brings her closer to release.

Outside the tent, Jared and Mello are cuddling in front of the fire. Suddenly, they hear the sounds of passionate sex coming from Norman and Emili’s tent.

“She’s shameless.” Mello mutters.


	16. 16

Norman is dreaming. In his dream he is stealthy tracking a “geek”. It’s 20 feet away, its movements slow; due to the broken ankle it pulls behind it. The injured foot makes greasy red streaks, marking its trail across the pavement. He tracks the undead thing with his crossbow, waiting for the opportune moment to send an arrow through its head. Before he can make his move a loud snap breaks his concentration.

He whips around, still aiming his crossbow, preparing for an ambush of the stinking masses of flesh. There is only darkness behind him and more sounds of snapping, crunching, and…snoring?

Norman’s eyes snap open. He is looking at the green roof of the tent, just barely illuminated by the moon hanging low in the sky. 

Beside him, Emili is snoring softly in her sleep. Her body is snuggled close to his, warm and soft. She shivers slightly as his breath teases the tendrils of hair lying across her neck. He places a soft kiss on her shoulder and pulls the blanket up tighter around her.

He is just closing his eyes again when he hears the loud crack of a tree branch breaking under someone’s foot. This time, he isn’t dreaming.

He untangles himself from Emili, slowly as not to disturb her. When he is free, he quickly puts on his jeans, boots, and t-shirt. After locating his jacket, he slips from the tent. The bonfire is still smoldering and he can smell the burning pine.

The snapping and crunching is constant, as if someone or something was walking across the forest floor. The sound bounces off the trees, amplifying the noise, making it hard to place the exact location.

Whoever it is doesn’t sound very large. It might possibly only be a deer or other animal. Still, he won’t be able to fall asleep again unless he knows for sure.

He considers waking Jared, but decides against it. After retrieving his cross bow, he steers the motorcycle away from their tents. He utilizes the headlight to illuminate his way.

He begins to follow the sound to the best of his ability. He has to move slow so the heavy weight of the bike doesn’t make too much noise and alert whatever he is following to his presence. 

When he has ventured at least 100 feet away, he pauses to look back at the camp. He can just make out the two tents, now only small green teepees in the distance. He contemplates turning back when a roar in the distance sends a chill up his spine.

He starts the motorcycle after taking another look behind him. He pictures Emili and Mello, asleep. They are momentarily safe from the horror of their situation. They had both experienced so much evil in their lives. Two beautiful, strong girls with big hearts who didn’t deserve to live with so much secret pain.

Determined, he steers his bike towards the roar and tears off through the trees.


	17. 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's back?

“Norman!” Emili screams waking Mello and Jared from their slumber. “Norman!!”

“Oh my god, something’s wrong!” Mello whips the sleeping bag from her body and runs to the door of the tent.

“Mello, wait.” Jared’s sleepy voice stops her.

“What?” She turns to ask him, crouching at the door of the tent, holding the flap in her hand.

“You don’t have any clothes on. Here.” He tosses his shirt her way and she throws it on, it reaches mid-thigh on her, enough to cover her nudity. She slithers out of the tent.

Jared lets his head fall back onto the pillow. He stares up at the roof of the tent, not ready to deal with another day of fighting and uncertainty. His life had changed completely in only two days’ time and he wasn’t sure he liked the direction it was heading. As he lay on the hard ground, hearing the sounds of birds chirping intermixed with the screams of Emili, he just wanted this all to end, any means necessary; even if it meant death. That thought terrified him, sending a piercing jolt throughout his body. He knew in that moment, he didn’t want this life.

Mello shivers in the early morning cold. She almost turns around to grab a pair of pants and shoes; but the sight of Emili falling to her knees sends her running.

“Emili! Are you okay? What’s wrong?” Mello falls to kneel beside Emili, whose face is streaked with tears. She is sobbing uncontrollably and can hardly catch her breath.

“C’mon, let’s go sit in the tent. You are freezing.” She grasps Emili by the arm and helps to pull her up. 

She leads her to the tent and lays a blanket across her shoulders. Despite the extra layers, Emili continues to shiver. Her tears are still streaming from her face and she rocks back and forth.

“Hey, calm down Em. What is going on?” Mello rubs her back trying to offer some comfort. 

“He is gone. Something’s wrong…I just know it.” She speaks in between sobs.

“What do you mean he is gone?” Mello glances around the tent.

“It’s because of me. I’m so st-stupid.” Her voice hitches as she sobs.

“I’m sure that isn’t it. He is probably taking a leak. His stuff is still here.” She points to the corner where his backpack is laying.

“His motorcycle is gone.”

“Shit.” Mello mutters. “You don’t think he went off to hunt them on his own?”

Emili has stopped crying and takes deep breaths before answering.

“I hope not.”

“Get dressed. The three of us will go look for him.” She stands but then quickly drops down again to give her best friend a reassuring hug. “We will find him. I swear to you, we will.”

Emili just nods and wraps her arms around her body. 

After leaving the tent, Mello walks to the edge of the campsite to look out into the trees for any sign of Norman. She sees nothing and is just heading back toward her and Jared’s tent when she notices the tire tracks from the motorcycle. It is leading deeper into the woods. Away from the direction of where they had originally walked to camp.

When she returns to the tent, Jared is still laying beneath the sleeping bag, an arm draped across his face. She feels a surge of anger at the fact he could be sleeping when one of them has suddenly gone missing.

“Hey.” Her voice is even and sharp.

He hears her, but goes on pretending to sleep. He can’t look at her right now. Not now that he has made his decision.

She takes in a deep, annoyed breath and kicks his leg with her bare toes. It is a soft but firm kick. Not meant to be spiteful, but she felt a sense of urgency. They needed to find Norman.

“What?” He asks sharply as he whips his arm from his face and glares at her. 

She automatically takes a step back. In all the years she has been with him and the arguments they had, he had never looked at her with such malice.

She stutters over her words before continuing. “We need to go look for Norman. He is missing.” 

He closes his eyes and doesn’t answer her. Her heart begins to pound in her chest and her body turns cold. When she realizes he isn’t going to move, she turns away from him and begins dressing. She just throws on the clothes she wore yesterday, adding a hoodie for warmth. Mornings in Ireland were chilly.

She is slipping on her boots when Jared finally sits up to look at her. He watches her silently as she adjusts her socks to cover her legs. When she finishes she looks up at him. She doesn’t speak for fear of saying the wrong thing and provoking him further.

They stare at each other in silence, both keeping neutral expressions. Minutes pass by slowly. They can hear the sounds of Emili’s boots crunching outside as she paces. It isn’t until her eyes begin to fill with tears that he says something.

“I’ll wait here.”

“So you just want us two girls to go off into the woods by ourselves?” She has fought back her tears. The chills have been replaced with a white heat pulsing through her body. She couldn’t understand why he was acting this way.

“You’ve done this before. I am sure you can both handle it.” Once again, he isn’t looking at her. Instead he is rubbing his palms across his face.

“Right.” It’s the last thing she says before she leaves the tent. Smacking the door flap behind her.

“Where’s Jared?” Emili asks as Mello comes walking up to her. She has also thrown on yesterday’s outfit.

“He is going to wait here in case Reedus comes back.” She begins walking and pauses to look back at Emili. “Ready?”

They walk quietly, following the trail from the tire tracks. It is loud in the woods. There are birds shrieking and rustling in the bushes from unseen creatures and the constant crack of snapping branches. Mello begins to feel hollowness in her belly as she considers the fact they may be heading into a trap.

They had just walked through a dense patch of trees and entered another clearing when Emili sees Norman’s jacket a couple yards away behind a large pine tree. It seems to be swaying in the wind even though the air is still. It’s when the jacket appears to be moving closer that they notice someone is carrying it.

“Norman!” Emili yells and runs to the man emerging from the trees. She stumbles to a halt when she doesn’t immediately recognize him.

“Nope. Better than Norman; Sean Patrick Flanery.” He struts out into the open air and flashes his usual cocky grin.

“Sean?” Emili is surprised. He was the last person she would expect to see here. “Oh my god!” She rushes to give him a hug. He wraps his arms around her body, squeezing her and she feels her body lift a few inches off the ground. He hugs her so tight she feels a bone in her back crack.

“Sean.’ She gasps, “You’re crushing me.”

“Oh sorry.” He chuckles as he sets her down. He slings the jacket around her shoulders and she takes in the smell of leather and Norman’s cologne. She slips it on, feeling only a little comfort from having it near her again.

“Where’s Norman?” She asks.

“I don’t know.” He shrugs as he walks toward the redhead he has just spotted standing at the other end of the clearing. She’s watching them with her arms crossed, a worried look on her face. He kind of likes the way her cheeks dimple as she bites her lip.

“What do you mean you don’t know?” Emili half jogs, trying to catch up to him.

He doesn’t break his stride as he answers. “Dunno. Found his jacket somewhere in the woods. Figured he dropped it at some point.” 

He stops in front of Mello, grinning, turning on the full Flanery charm. She doesn’t look at him, but instead over his shoulder at Emili.

Mello reaches out to touch the sleeve of the jacket for a second before looking at her fingers. “Blood,” she whispers.

“What?!” Emili’s eyes go wide as she removes the jacket. She too runs her hands along the sleeve. It leaves a small smudge of blood on her hand. “It’s still wet.”

“That means he should still be nearby, right?” Mello bends down to wipe her hand on the grass. There is still a red stain on her fingertips. When she stands, Sean is still staring at her, waiting for acknowledgment.

“Hey. I’m Sean Patrick Flanery.” He throws his arms out to the side like she should be more impressed with his presence.

“Yeah I know.” She glances at him annoyed before turning back to Emili, noticing her eyes beginning to fill with tears again.

“Hey, it’s okay. I’m sure he is fine. It’s just a little blood. Maybe he wrecked his bike.” 

“Oh that’s comforting.” Emili says sarcastically.

“And you are?” The question is so out of place with the conversation and the serious nature of finding Norman’s bloodstain jacket that it takes a moment for Mello to realize Sean is speaking to her.

“What?” She looks at him in confusion.

“Who. Are. You?” He speaks slowly like he was talking to someone with special needs.

“I. am. Mello.” She responds in the same fashion before adding. “Duh.”

They stare at each other, in a battle of wills, each trying to intimidate the other to look away first. Emili, knowing both Mello and Sean quite well, breaks through the tension.

“Let’s head back. I didn’t bring my machete and you should grab your shotgun.”

“Sure.” Mello responds to Emili, but still scowling at Sean.

He smirks at her one last time before looking at Emili and grinning. “I brought trail mix.” He pulls a plastic bag from his backpack and shoves it into Mello’s hands before turning his back on her and striding away.


	18. 18

As they got closer to the tents, they saw Norman’s bike and he himself leaning against it. Emili cried out in relief and ran to him.

“Norman!” she squealed as she rushed into his arms. He embraced her, breathing in the scent of her hair and kissing her neck and exposed shoulder. “I thought you left me.”

“Never.” He placed her face in his hands so he could look into her eyes. He planted a soft kiss on her lips. Emili responded by kissing him harder, snaking her fingers through his hair to pull him closer to her.

Mello smiles as she looks away from the two of them, catching Jared’s eye. She smiles wider, deciding in that moment to forget about what happened that morning. She was happy to have Norman back and have her best friend smiling again.

Sean is standing next to Mello, observing her. She looks like an entirely different person when she is not scowling. He follows her line of sight and notices Jared staring morosely back at her. She doesn’t seem to notice as she skips to him, looking like puppy begging for a treat.

“Hey baby.” She stands on her tip toes to kiss him. He inhales sharply, pressing his mouth to hers before suddenly breaking the kiss and wrapping his arms around her in a hug. 

“I’m sorry about this morning. I didn’t mean to seem like a bitch it’s just that…” She stops apologizing when she feels the toe of her boot kick something on the ground. Looking down, she sees Jared’s brown leather overnight bag lying at his feet. 

“Going somewhere?” She asks amused, with the slightest hint of fear in her voice.

“This isn’t working for me.” Jared mutters into the top of her head. He feels her body become rigid in his arms and he lets them fall to his sides. Although he is frightened of what he may see, he still forces himself to look at her.

“What isn’t working for you?” Her voice is quiet as she tries to control her emotions. 

“Mello, you know I love you....”

“NO!” She shouts, drawing the attention of the others. “Don’t even fucking say it.” 

Jared inhales deeply and shuts his eyes, gathering his strength. When he opens them to look at her again, she is shaking as she tries unsuccessfully not to cry.

“Mello, love.” Jared whispers, glancing at the others, embarrassed by her outburst.

“Don’t ‘Mello, love’ me!”

“Mello, stop acting like a child.” He takes a few steps backwards to put distance between them and it doesn’t go unnoticed by her. A wave a shock courses through her body. She opens her mouth but is rendered speechless. “I’m sorry. I just can’t do this anymore.” 

In the bright sunlight, she can clearly see the lines on his face. He looks physically and emotionally drained and she feels a wave of guilt.

“I’m sorry.” She says quieter now. “I shouldn’t have dragged you into this. I understand if you need to go. I love you and I want you to be safe. I’ll come back to you when this is all over.” She smiles.

“You don’t understand. I don’t want this.” He nervously picks up his bag, just so he would have something in his hands. Something so he wouldn’t be tempted to reach out and touch her. He knew if he felt her soft skin he would give in to her again, like he always does.

“No. You don’t want me.” She sobs out the last word. When he doesn’t deny it, she starts to cry, feeling the pain in every inch of her body.

She always feared this day would come but she assumed it would be a mutual decision. That they would have grown apart from each other and decided it would be best to go their separate ways. She never considered the fact that things would end when one of them would still be in love.

“I’m sorry but this is who you are. This troll hunter and I don’t think I can handle the thought of something happening to you. I love you. I will always love you, but I just can’t handle this anymore. I never meant for it to go on for this long.”

“What?” She stumbles back, suddenly feeling sick to her stomach. 

The others are watching the scene play out in front of them. Norman has lit a cigarette and is taking deep agitated drags from it.

“Why the fuck is he doing this to her?” He growls under his breath.

Emili watches her best friend falling apart. She begins to cry herself as she sees the pain on Mello’s face. She doesn’t know what to do, whether she should comfort her or give Jared the opportunity to fix things.

“Don’t just stand there. Hold her.” Emili whispers, willingly him to magically follow her command.

“Dude, this is really awkward.” Sean says as he watches the redhead bawl, her face red and puffy.

Emili and Norman ignore him as they stare in disbelief as Jared turns away from Mello and begins to walk towards them. As he comes closer, Emili’s icy stare stops him in his tracks. Ashamed, he turns and offers his hand to Norman.

“I apologize for this. I wish you all the best of luck.”

Norman doesn’t say a word, but shakes his hand firmly, and stares coldly at him. 

Jared nods at Sean, takes one last quick glance at Emili, and turns his back on the campsite and the troll hunters. 

“Mel!” Emili rushes to Mello who is sitting on the ground rocking herself with her arms wrapped around her knees. She tries to hug her but Mello pushes her away.

“I’m gonna be sick.” She jumps up and stumbles forward a few feet before falling to her knees and puking. She feels her hair being pulled away from her face. She wants to tell Emili to look away but can’t speak as she heaves the contents of her stomach onto the ground. When she is done, she sits back and notices Norman and Sean standing over her.

“Oh my god.” She groans, feeling her cheeks reddened with embarrassment. “I feel like such an idiot.”

“Don’t. Here, drink this.” Norman hands her a bottle of water which she gulps down.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She tells them as more tears begin to stream down her face.

“Stop apologizing.” Emili says soothingly as she hugs her. “You have nothing to be sorry for.”

Mello just nods and buries her face in her knees, waiting to wake up from this nightmare. She almost laughs at how ridiculous she was, crying over a man, when she had the guts to shoot a troll in just her underwear.

“Stupid.” She whispered to herself.

“No, you’re not. That was a real dick move he did. I can’t believe him.” 

“Is she going to be okay?” Sean asks, looking uncomfortable. Norman and Emili shrug, not really knowing how to answer. Neither of them has ever seen her look so vulnerable.

“I’m going to be fine.” Mello answers, as she staggers to a standing position. “I just need to be alone for a while.” She smiles meekly at Emili before shuffling to her tent and crawling inside.

“Dude, how embarrassing. She’s a mess.” Sean retorts.

“Yeah she’s a mess.” Norman counters as he looks at Sean’s feet. “But you’re standing in vomit.”


	19. chapter 19

Emili felt a sharp ache in her heart for her best friend. The feeling of it, mixed with the relief of Norman’s return, left her head spinning. She hears him sigh deeply beside her and she looks at him, studying his face. He has a long scratch just above his left eyebrow, crusted with blood. 

“Is it too early for a drink?” She asks as she retrieved a cigarette and lit it. The nicotine dulled her nerves a bit and she was grateful she had never quit the habit.

He glances at the sky, a neon blue with only a few wisps of grey. The bright sun was still low in the east, noon was still hours away.

“Given our current circumstances, I don’t think it matters.” He searches the campground for the bottle and spies it near the logs they had occupied last night. He walks over and grabbed it, shaking its contents. There was still half a bottle.

“If you’re drinking, count me in.” Sean says as he drags his foot along the ground, trying to scrap the remnants of vomit off his boot. Norman tosses him the bottle, which Sean agilely catches. The three of them sit on logs around the still slightly smoldering wood of the campfire. They sit in silence, passing the bottle around and taking swigs. 

“So, are you going to tell us where the fuck you went last night?” Emili asks, slowly blowing streams of smoke, trying to appear nonchalant. She passes Norman the bottle without taking a sip.

“I heard a noise last night while we were sleeping. I got up to check it out. I wanted to make sure it was nothing serious. I took my bike so I could use the headlight to see and in case I needed to get away fast.” He takes a deep sigh before continuing.

“I saw a shadow, at first I thought it was a deer or a bear, but it was much bigger and walking on two legs.”

“A troll?” Emili asks, her eyes wide open.

Norman just nods as he lights a cigarette and takes a deep drag.

“Are you serious? What the fuck happened? Did it see you?” Emili glances around as if she expected to see a troll standing over her shoulder.

“No it didn’t see me, but I followed it.” Norman’s story was interrupted by a snort coming from Sean. He smirks as he takes a swig of whiskey. His eyes glint with disbelief as he gazes at them over the neck of the bottle.

“Don’t tell us that we have to convince you that trolls are real, too.” Emili says as she snatches the bottle from him.

“Trolls? Like, real trolls? Like, answer this riddle and we shall let you cross this bridge trolls?” 

“Not exactly, but yeah, REAL trolls.”

He just rolls his eyes and gazes toward the tents, seeming to lose himself in thought. After a minute of silence, Emili mumbles, “You’ll see.” Sean seems to ignore her, or not hear her at all as he continues to stare at the tents, furrowing his brow.

Norman glances over his shoulder and sees a flicker of light coming from Mello’s tent. It also sounds as if she is talking to someone and he can hear her words interrupted by the sound of sobbing ever now and then. He looks at Emili and questions her with his eyes. She answers him silently by shaking her head.

“So you followed them?” Emili asks Norman.

“Not them, it. I only saw one, but I know where they live.” He takes another drag of his cigarette, then a sip of whiskey, and passes the bottle back to her. 

She takes a drink before asking him, “Where?”

“In the mountains; there’s a cave.”

Emili swishes the bottle of whiskey in circles, digesting this information. She looks at Sean, curious to what his reaction to their conversation is. He breaks from his trance and looks over Emili’s shoulder stunned. She and Norman take notice and both turn to look, suddenly seeing a figure standing behind them.

Shocked, they jump up, arms raised, expecting to have to fight off a troll.

Instead, it’s Mello. She is standing still, staring at them dully. Her once sparking green eyes are now the color of dead seaweed, all sparkle and life gone. Her red hair lies against her face, tendrils pasted to her cheeks by dried tears. 

Her voice is toneless as she speaks to them.

“Let’s go kill some trolls.”


	20. 20

They each packed their own belongings in silence; all except for Sean. Instead, he was standing in a small clearing practicing his Jiu-jitsu moves. He had just performed a side mount move on an invisible opponent when Emili notices him out of the corner of her eye.

“What’s he doing?” She whispers to Norman, who glances over at his friend and responds, “It’s that Brazilian Jiu-jitsu shit he’s always preaching about.”

“Well, could you tell him to do it in silence? We are trying to launch a sneak attack, not draw them to us.”

Sean, overhearing their conversation, bows to them as he says, “Brazilian Jiu-jitsu is a silent, gentle art.”

“Well, you are still fucking loud.” Emili mutters as she zips her bag closed.

The crunching sound of footsteps causes them all to glance up. They see Mello approaching them. She has her bags packed and strapped to her back, along with the tent. “Are you guys almost ready to go?”

“Yep.” Norman answers her as he loads his and Emili’s bags onto his bike. Once he is sure they are safely secured, he turns to the group. “How are we doing this?”

“You and Emili take your motorcycle. I’ll set off on foot and we can meet up. Just tell me where to go.” She avoids looking at Sean as she talks.

“You aren’t going alone. Sean is going with you.” Emili tells her and Mello just shrugs indifferently.

“Whatever.” She whispers to herself. 

“Wow, don’t sound so enthusiastic about spending a little time with me.” Sean quips. She ignores his remark as she picks up the flamethrower. She holds it in her hands, examining it. She seems lost in thought for a moment. Finally, she turns to Sean. “Think you can handle this?” She asks as she shoves the heavy weapon into his hand.

“I think I can manage.” He smirks and she rolls her eyes as she turns back towards Norman.

“Which direction are we heading?”

“About 5 miles; northeast. Look for a large opening in the mountains. There is a cave. That is where they stay. We will meet you there.” He looks uneasily from her to Sean, considering whether splitting up is a good idea.

Seeming to read his mind, Emili wraps her arms around his waist and kisses him on the neck. “They’ll be fine,” she whispers into his ear. He looks at her and smiles before kissing her tenderly on the mouth.

“See you there then.” Mello grunts before swiftly turning and heading out into the forests, not even glancing behind her to see if Sean is following. He just watches her go, frustration building inside her. 

Abruptly, Emili is in front of him and staring into his eyes, earnestly. “Stay with her. Don’t leave her for even a second. If you let anything happen to her, I swear…” She trails off.

“Yeah, I know. I got it. What else should I do?”

“Keep up.” She orders him as she nods towards Mello, who is disappearing into the distance.

“Okay. See you guys soon.” He gives them a little salute before jogging off to catch up with Mello.

“I got a bad feeling about this.” Norman says as he hops on the bike. Emili climbs on behind him and wraps her arms around his waist.

“They’ll be fine.” She replies, not sure who she is trying to convince more. Norman or herself.


	21. 21

It takes Sean half a mile to catch up with her. She is walking briskly, agilely avoiding fallen logs and low hanging branches. Her moves are swift, quiet, and catlike. By the time her reaches her side, he is his usual, easygoing self. As the minutes tick by, he can no longer stand the silence.

“So…” He says as he nudges her softly. She glances at him sideways, irritated and snaps back, “So?”

“So…how long have you been hunting trolls?” 

“Long.”

“What are we in for? Little trolls with big poofy hair and jewels in their belly buttons?”

“No.” Her responses are short and curt.”

“So, more like ‘Trolls! In the dungeon!” He laughs.

Ordinarily, a Harry Potter reference would excite her, but the mention of it only brings a cold stab to her heart. She ignores him and quickens her pace.

“So, c’mon really, what are we hunting?” He provokes her further.

She stops brusquely to turn and yell at him. “Trolls, Jared!” Realizing her mistake, she turns white, her eyes wide and surprised.

“Jared, huh?” He snorts. “So, what’s up with him anyways? Isn’t he a bit too old for you?” 

“What’s it matter to you?” She snaps as she crosses her arms and glares.

“I just wouldn’t expect a girl like you to be into jiggling saggy old balls.”

“Wow.” She says, disgusted with him. She turns away and begins walking again.

“Seriously, does your foreplay include an Epson salt bath and the crossword?” He laughs as he strides behind her. “I bet you have to use shock paddles each time you fuck him.”

She tries her best to ignore him and maintain her composure, but his cruel remarks are pissing her off. When he falls silent, she assumes her cold shoulder has given him the hint. Unfortunately, that’s not the case.

“Your pussy must have stopped tasting like Metamucil because he left you.”

When she suddenly stops short and hunches over, hands on her knees and shoulders shaking, he believes he has finally broken through her cold façade. He grins at her as she stands to turn to him, expecting to see her shaking with silent laughter. Instead, he is stunned to see her eyes welling up with tears. 

“Don’t pretend like you know anything about him.” Her voice comes out in a deathly whisper.

“Okay, so he broke up with you? Big deal! Everybody has a bad day.”

“This isn’t a bad day. This is a fucking nightmare because I am stuck with you, some karate kid wannabe!” She shrieks, finally losing what little patience she has left.

“It’s not karate, its Brazilian Jiu-jitsu. But don’t pretend to know anything about it.” He mocks.

“You know what?!” She screams before lunging at him and smacking him across the right side of his face. The sound echoes throughout the forest. 

He looks at her in complete disbelief. “What the fuck was that for?” He asks her.

“For pushing my best friend out of a plane, and while we are on the subject.” She pauses to smack him again across the other side of the face. “That’s for pushing Norman out of a plane.”

Before he has a chance to respond, the earth begins to slightly shake. They both look at the ground beneath their feet before turning to look to the side, realizing they are standing at the entrance to the cave.

“What is that?” He asks slowly, knowing the answer, but asking her anyway.

“What we came here for. Get your weapon ready.” She orders as she grabs her shotgun and aims it at the cave, waiting.

He holds the flamethrower in his hand, aiming it about two feet above the ground. He figures he will be able to blast the little suckers in one fluid motion and turn them to charcoal. What he isn’t expecting is that his weapon would be pointed at just merely the foot and ankle of a troll, not the entire body.

He has to pane his gaze upwards to see the full impressive creature in all its 9 foot glory.

“Holy shit!”

Emili is pacing in front of the cave opening. She and Norman have been waiting for what seemed like hours for Mello and Sean.

“Where are they?” She asks Norman, worry altering her voice slightly. “Shouldn’t they have been here by now?”

“Don’t forget, they are meeting us here on foot.” He steps away from where he had been leaning on his bike to grab her and hold her steady. When he begins nuzzling his face into her neck, she giggles at him, feeling less anxious. She turns so she can kiss him, letting all her worries melt away into passion.

“You know,’ he whispers huskily, “we might have a little time to waste.”   
She moans and grabs him by the shirt, tugging him toward the cover of some trees. 

“Wait, wait.” He stops her, pausing to listen for something. “I thought I heard voices.” She lets her arm drop to her side, trying to hear over the typical forest sounds of birds and wild creatures. She can hear, faintly, Sean saying something like, “Where’s the door?” followed by the sound of skin smacking skin.

Then, the ground begins to rumble.


End file.
